15 Cuddling Positions for Couples to Cozy Up Tonight
For when you just can't get enough of your ✨lover✨.
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A good cuddle is not only great for making efficient use of available couch space, but it also has tons of side benefits, including helping you feel closer to your partner, relaxing your body and mind, and unleashing all those feel-good happy brain chemicals. So, let the lounging begin with these cuddling positions, plus some new ways go deeper and make it even more snuggly! (And even if you kinda hate cuddling—the urge to flee is real—these cuddling positions can still help you snag some of those sweet, sweet benefits before you escape back to your side of the bed.)
“Couples who are more physically affectionate report higher levels of love, fondness, and relationship satisfaction,” says Jess O’Reilly, PhD, resident sexologist at Astroglide. “Physical affection can also result in the release of feel-good hormones, like oxytocin, which can improve mood, offset stress (cortisol) and deepen connection.” (And PS, if a human is unavailable, you can get the same benefits by cuddling with a pet.)
If one of you isn’t a huge cuddler, that’s okay too—it has nothing to do with how much they love you! “I don’t want people to worry their partner is going to leave them because they need a little space to fall asleep,” says certified couples therapist Laura Silverstein, LCSW, author of Love Is an Action Verb. But if your love language is physical touch, make sure to let your partner know so you can find something that works for both other you.
Don’t know where to start? Fear not. “There is no right or wrong way to cuddle as long as both partners like the touch,” Silverstein says. Below, 15 cuddle positions to get you started, plus what each kind of cuddle says about your bond.
The Forehead Cuddle
To connect deeply with your partner, lie on your sides facing each other with your foreheads touching and your eyes closed. “Wrap your legs and arms around one another to get comfy or use pillows to prop up any sensitive spots,” says O’Reilly. “Oftentimes, I ask couples to use the forehead-cuddle to reset with 7-11 relaxed breaths. They tend to report feeling silly at first and then feeling more connected and at ease by the end. They keep their eyes closed, but report ‘feeling’ their partner smiling throughout the experience.” Cute!
What it means: “We are connecting on a higher plane, y’all. Ohmm."
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Rub-A-Dub Hug
Most tubs are so small that if you take a bath together, you will be cuddling. May as well lean into it, literally. Sit between your partner’s legs and lean back. (Or they can lean on you. Mix n’ match as you please.) There. That’s nice, isn’t it?
What it means: “We are big on spending time together."
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The Look of Love
A deeply intimate cuddle with just hand-holding? It can be done! Lie on your sides facing each other. “Hold hands and don’t worry about any other points of contact—just do what feels more comfortable and natural to allow your hands to touch,” says O’Reilly. “Slow your breath and allow it to sync. According to this study from UC Davis, you’ll likely find that your breath, and even heat rhythms, sync when you’re in close proximity. Once your breath slows and you’re feeling relaxed, slowly open your eyes and allow your gaze to soften as your eyes meet.”
What it means: “Let’s go really deep.”
Head-in-Lap
The head-in-lap move can go sweet or sexy, depending on where you take it. “Placing your head on your partner's lap is a very intimate position, whether you’re watching Netflix, reading a book, or just chatting about your day,” says Silverstein. “It reinforces intimacy and safety, and might even lead to a passionate moment.”
What it means: “You’re my lover, not my roommate.”
Feet-in-Lap
“Rubbing each other’s feet communicates acceptance and care,” says Silverstein. Plus, it’s bonding too. “Providing tension release builds a sense of trust as you each comfort and allow the other to comfort you.” (Pro tip: If your partner’s feet could smell a little better, rub in some aromatic massage oil. Everybody wins and no one gets their feelings hurt!)
What it means: “I trust you.”
The Quickie
“When one partner is busy with a task, such as prepping a meal or working on a laptop, you can remind them that you think they’re awesome by hugging them from behind and squeezing their shoulders or kissing their neck. This allows your partner to keep working with a warm reminder that they’re loved,” says Silverstein. (Pro tip: If you’re the cuddler, let your busy partner keep doing their thing. Don’t try to sex it up—save it for later 😉.)
What it means: “I’m not asking for your attention, just letting you know I’m here for you.”
Spooning (Little Spoon)
Spooning is the platonic ideal of cuddling, and nothing beats being the little spoon. You get to feel your partner's arms around you while still having the freedom to extend your own arms or legs if you want. And if you have a sudden urge to get up, not much is stopping you.
What it means: "I feel safe, protected, and nurtured by you."
Spooning (Big Spoon)
The smaller partner doesn't always have to be the little spoon. It's fun to mix it up! Plus, your partner deserves to feel loved and protected, too. Trust—you'll love holding them tight.
What it means: "I'm taking care of you, babe, don't worry about a thing."
The Cuddle Hug
Lie on your sides facing each other, hug, and just keep hugging. It’s a super intimate way to connect with some deep eye contact and kisses.
What it means: "I want to connect with you and know what you're thinking and feeling."
The Half Spoon
In the underrated Half Spoon, lay your head on your partner's chest while they lie on their back with their arm around you, or vice versa. You can listen to their heartbeat or fall asleep. (Note: Expect to be moved at some point because their arm will fall asleep.)
What it means: “It’s you and me, babe, safe, comfortable, and connected.”
The Seated Cuddle
Watching TV together can, in fact, be romantic, but only if you retain some semblance of human contact. Lean over and put your head on your partner's shoulders. They can put their arm around you and/or you can slide your legs onto their thighs for extra love.
What it means: "I want to share the things that are important to you (even if that means watching a show I hate).”
The Butt Touch
This position is a cute way to keep contact while still keeping your own damn space. Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera had separate houses that were next to each other with a connecting bridge. This is the cuddling equivalent.
What it means: "I'm exhausted and want some space, but I like knowing you're right behind me."
The Blanket Share
Get a *big* snuggly blanket to avoid blanket warfare. One person lies on the couch, the other lies on top and beside them. This works for like one minute then someone gets mushed, no one can truly see the screen and you end up in the Seated Cuddle or Spooning. But you tried.
What it means: "What's yours is mine and I want to be as close to you as humanly possible right now."
Intertwining Legs
Lie side-by-side on your backs and intertwine your legs freestyle. Each of you has your own space but you're still ~connected~.
What it means: "I'm glad you're here with me," or "That was incredible, let me just catch my breath for a sec.”
The Pyramid
Someone lies down. The other lies on top. Not sustainable for an extended period but an excellent “I want you so fucking bad” move.
What it means: "Do me now.”
Jill Hamilton is a contributor for Cosmopolitan.com and writes the blog In Bed With Married Women.
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