“And tomorrow,” I tell the team, “I’m going to Warsaw, to announce a major increase in our support for Ukraine.”
Chris Philp says I’m being very brave, and I should look out for bombs. So I remind him that Warsaw isn’t in Ukraine itself, but in Poland.
“These are different countries?” says Chris.
“Yes, Chris,” I say.
Then I say it’s not just about Ukraine, anyway. Because the threat is growing, and it’s time for us to go on a war footing.
“You bet it is,” says James Cleverly. “Labour are doing really well. And the local elections are going to be a wipeout.”
“He didn’t mean that threat,” says Grant Shapps, meaningfully.
“I’m right here,” says Kemi Badenoch.
“No, you fools,” I snap.
